Sports Fans Need to Learn How to Window Shop

Sports fans need a serious lesson in window shopping. When you window shop, you go to the mall, walk around, peruse the expensive stuff you’ll never actually buy, and then you leave. Window shopping involves spending no money (except perhaps on a delicious Auntie Anne’s pretzel, which we all know is not actually a waste), and no buyer’s remorse. It’s a win-win for everyone involved.

Sounds nice doesn’t it? Well, that’s exactly what All-Star Games are all about. The games give viewers the chance to admire talent they don’t get to see often, all without the pressure and the permanent scars left from Johnny Damon double-steals in the World Series and the like.

Yet, no one seems to watch?

I know the formats aren’t perfect. Fan voting turned All-Star Games into worse popularity contests than homecoming court, and resulted in 87 Ottawa Senators on one hockey team. The Pro Bowl got moved to the Bye week before the Super Bowl to avoid, as Roger Goodell said, "a somewhat anticlimactic" end to the season. Now people hate it even more. Oh, and then there’s Bud Selig and the whole “This Time It Counts (again and again and again),” thing. I mean deciding who gets home field advantage in the World Series by who wins an exhibition game? Really?

Disagree with these things as you might (and I do), the leagues are doing what they can to keep the events alive, bring in some viewers, and draw some revenue from them. It’s a business. I get that part. But what I don’t get is why these games don’t gather the usual, ravenous fan base?

Near as I can figure, it’s the lack of actual competition, which is sort of sad when you think about it. If people can’t be completely emotionally invested in something, it’s like it just doesn’t matter. But isn’t that exactly the point? These games don’t matter. These events are supposed to be an opportunity for the best and brightest to show off their skills and for us the fans to enjoy their talent. No one’s supposed to live or die by these things.

In this year’s NHL All-Star Skills Competition, the sport showed off the fact that it’s stronger than it’s been in a long time. Players that aren’t Ovechkin or Crosby displayed their personalities and talents in a hell of an entertaining evening. Patrick Kane both dressed up like Superman and put together an exploding puck. Goalies were practically doing somersaults in net. And, Daniel Sedin was Daniel Sedin all over the passing competition. (See YouTube here, 13:45 mark or preferably just watch the whole video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5TnnohSzTzs) The night had no impact on anything – it was just fun.

The Home Run Derby and Midsummer Classic are two of my favorite days of the year. The best baseball players from the first half of the season gather together to hit the crap out of some baseballs and play each other in an exhibition game, just like all the baseball All-Stars have done every year before them (the Derby as we know since 1985 and the Game since 1933). Players bring their kids, enjoy the honor of being an All-Star and then proceed into the best months of the season. What’s not to like? Why does it have to matter?

I’m sure even on post #2 you’ve all figured out that I’m a bit of a purist, but if you put the best talents in a sport on TV in a celebration of skill, individual achievement, and the sport itself, I’ll be watching… even if I’m the only one.